I Chose Me and Never Looked Back

Updated: Mar 15, 2019

By Lola Morgan


How many people strip themselves halfway naked when they come home from work? Walking through the door, they relieve themselves of the things they’ve been holding on to throughout the day.

I myself have fallen guilty of this many times. The extra sigh of relief that we get feels so soothing and therapeutic!

As I have rebalanced my gifts with the world, I have discovered and digested a great bit of information for “moving forward” in life.

One of which I’ve witnessed through a childhood friend named Takia. Takia exemplifies a huge amount of resilience, grace, and is known for being in tune with all of her abilities- good and bad; which she learned from her mother, Iya!

I recall recently sitting in Takia's cozy home, embraced by Takia and her family listening to Iya giving advice to Takia about the tough time she was having regarding separating her old life from the things she wanted to gain in the near future.

The greatest aha-moment was when Iya dropped gems of wisdom about a job she once left for another.  It’s common to question why one would leave one situation hoping for the best in another. This question came up again in our conversation like a sore thumb.

FINDING BALANCE...

Iya was a Senior Recruiter for a notable company I won’t disclose. Iya worked with this company for five-plus years. While she  felt a shift early on, she now felt stagnant in her current position. There were things like the stale environment, the people who refused to take accountability for their mishaps which caused other team members to struggle, and the misdirection of upper management which caused her to look elsewhere for a better balance.

What do you do in a situation where you are incapable of utilizing all of your skills for the greater good because of a sacrifice you’ve made early on? Iya found herself in a predicament where it was time to find peace in her present, but seek open opportunities elsewhere.

In many different situations, the thought of elevating or choosing ourselves somehow makes us very uncomfortable. How does this feeling come about? Are we subconsciously taught to sabotage what doesn’t feel familiar to protect ourselves? How overwhelming must it be to have desires and not act on them?

As Iya sat in front of Takia and myself, I could see the mountain of emotions that she projected when telling us about her past predicament.

WHAT ARE YOU WORTH?

Here you have a woman who has committed herself to a situation that no longer serves her, and how dare she ask for anything more than what she is worth?

Iya exclaimed as she wrote down her prayers and fighting resistance of what negative thoughts were to come with her acknowledgement of this. Iya taught us that choosing a balanced life in all aspects should flow evenly. When there is disarray and manipulation that you accept at work, that energy could be brought home, and Iya was one to never play with the place she rests her soul and builds a healthy foundation for her children-it just wasn’t feasible.

​THE REBIRTH…

Iya stated before she took any job offer she wrote down all of the things that held her back in life. Details came about that she didn’t know she even harnessed. She acknowledged her pain, her guilt, her ability to commit to things that have flaws, and she released them.

With tears of joy coming from her eyes, Iya gleamed as she states, “making the decision to face me, and the things that held me back made me whole. From that day forward I moved in rhythm with my expectations and accepting nothing less than what I visualized. I repurposed myself, created discipline, and put in the work to attain all that I desire”.

Iya insisted that this was the best process and decision she ever made in her life. Iya exudes the energy of someone who radiates happiness, and wholeness. Takia and I giggled like little school girls in awe of her mother’s amazement, and Takia followed in her footsteps taking the necessary choices to grasp all she sought forth.

I am overwhelmingly grateful for having the support and experiences of wonderful souls who allow me to share the intimate details of their life. How valuable would life be without experiences to share. I look forward to hearing your thoughts on their journey.

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About the Author:



Lola B. Morgan


Branding Specialist, Influencer, and Creator of A GRIOT'S CORNER, are just minor details to this young woman's story. Creatively captivating her audience, Lola proclaims excellence in her life and others, using her voice to reveal untold stories and pushing content that allows reflection. Looking to ride her coat-tail? She's just a click away: @oooh_lo_lah

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